Relational Infrastructure
Building foundations for genuine connection
About
Relational Infrastructure is the foundational tools, systems, and frameworks that enable and support strong, and effective relationships. Just as we use roads and bridges to connect our cities, we need thoughtfully designed spaces, tools, and ways of coming together that help us form genuine relationships. These spaces and tools will work for all of us, no matter who we are or what stage of life we're in, and will be built around what humans actually need and not just what's most efficient. It's about creating the foundation that helps us truly connect, share our stories, and build lasting bonds with the people around us.
Social Products
A working map of products, resources, and formats that help people find each other, understand each other, and build stronger social habits.
Tier 2
Individual Social Management
Tools that help people discover, plan, and maintain healthier social rhythms.
Eventure
Our productEvent discovery platform bringing events from across your city into one calendar.
Jet Lag: The Game Hide and Seek Transit Game
A real-world game format built around exploration, coordination, and shared play.
Questions For Humans
Conversation cards that make deeper, more intentional conversations easier to start.
Focus Friend, by Hank Green
A friendly focus app that supports attention, routines, and small daily commitments.
Tier 3
Social Schema & Instructions
Resources that explain how relationships form, how social systems behave, and what to practice.
YouTube Playlist
Our productSocial schemas and relationship building.
Let Grow
Guidance and programs that help kids build independence and community trust.
Anxious Generation
Research and recommendations about childhood, phones, play, and social development.
Man of the Year Podcast
Conversations about friendship, masculinity, and maintaining adult relationships.
HealthyGamerGG
Mental health education with practical frameworks for communication and self-awareness.
Imgur Community Resources
Community guidelines and resources for building healthier online spaces.
Welcome to the Era of Relational Intelligence
An SSIR article on relational intelligence as a needed civic and organizational skill.
Not Just a Hobby
A case for hobbies as meaningful social infrastructure, not just personal recreation.
Recent Blog Posts
Managing The Flood
May 7, 2026Some costs we can count. One hundred and thirteen people died in the Los Angeles flood of 1938, and the public outrage that followed handed engineers permission to build the most aggressive river control system on Earth. The flooding stopped. The deaths stopped. The benefit was real and you can put it in a spreadsheet. […]
Annoyance Is The Cost To Feel Human
May 6, 2026After reading The Comfort Crisis By Michael Easter a few years ago I’ve come to the conclusion that in order to feel human you must be annoyed from time to time. I’ve touched on this indirectly without realizing it a few times before in The Fun People Are In The Middle Seat and Why Do […]
Why Do Actual Things When I Can Experience It Through Video Online
December 12, 2025The more I explore and develop my thoughts around Relational Infrastructure the one thing that keeps becoming clear is little I know about it. “Why don’t I have friends?” “Why do I feel alone?” Those questions would and still do constantly popup in my head and I’d never have a good answer for them. I’d […]
Make Your Routines More Work
October 10, 2025The routines we have in our lives, for better or for worse, dictate how we think of the world. When we have too many commitments the routines we create tend to favor convenience instead of what is actually best. I think this is natural since overtime we start to optimize the routine and learn new […]
People Want To Be Acknowledged
October 7, 2025I recently read in Reclaiming Relationship in a Technological World by Andy Crouch that during your birth and death you want to be around and connect with people you know in trust. During your birth this is your mother and you are looking for her care, and eye contact. During your final moments, if you’re […]
PHP x NYC: Designing Robust Relational Infrastructure
August 21, 2025Stop Showing So Much, and Instead Tell Better
August 14, 2025I’ve recently noticed during in-person conversations with other people the need for facts to be validated by something other than other people in the group. When I say a fact I have to resist the urge to find if what I’m saying is still valid or not from Wikipedia, a search, or whatever other place […]
How to Avoid Humans
July 27, 2025Do you have too many friends? Are you too social? Do you wish you’d be able to spend less meaningful time with people? Here are some things you can do to avoid humans: If you apply all of these techniques, you’ll be sure to have all humans avoid you and you’ll finally be at peace.
Living Life Through Announcements
June 26, 2025Social media has shifted our memories and relationships into a series of announcements. Every time I go on social media I’m often reminded how many people are getting married, having kids, and other, seemingly endless, life events. Conversations about old friends are boiled down to “I seen on Facebook that they…”, instead of through the […]